


Amy & Rosa's incredibly gay adventures

by Catholic_Schoolgirl



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Allergic reaction, Don't worry Amy doesn't die, F/F, Peanut allergy, Rosa is a softie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-20
Updated: 2016-09-21
Packaged: 2018-08-16 08:58:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8095999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catholic_Schoolgirl/pseuds/Catholic_Schoolgirl
Summary: Collection of one shots (my first attempt ever) hopefully I'll be able to update regularly - but I wouldn't count on it.





	1. Breathe

**Author's Note:**

> All of these were written using prompts I found God-knows-where and I hope I'm not stepping on any toes by using them.  
> I have never in my life written something like this so please be nice :)  
> I hope you like it!

It was tuesday, which meant date-night. They always tried to get the same days off, but that turned out to be much harder than expected, and so, they decided on a date night. It very simply meant, that neither of them was allowed to be home any later than seven on tuesdays - cases be damned. Today they had decided on trying that new vietnamese fusion restaurant a short drive from the apartment.

*** 

Amy started to feel an itch on her upper chest, playing it cool and acting as if it was nothing for six minutes did nothing - she couldn’t ignore it. Rosa being too caught up in looking at the menu didn’t notice, and while Amy pretended to be fine, she really wasn’t.  
“Hey so I uhm. I just have to run outside to make a call - will you order for me, just get me a salad” Rosa just smiled at her “Sure, the chicken one with lemongrass and coriander?” Amy returned her smile and nodded, and then she was out the door. Rosa looked at Amy’s retreating back and just shrugged, she couldn’t really blame her for having to make a call - maybe her aunt was back in town? As long as she wasn’t calling Peralta and freaking the fuck out about something case-related, their date night would still end smoothly. 

She didn’t really have to make a call, she just couldn’t stand inside the restaurant anymore, her itching getting worse every second. She sat down on one of those ugly cafe chairs with the bad plastic-pretending-to-be-weave pattern and breathed deeply while using her newly cut nails (which she had filed down cautiously thank-you-very-much) to scratch her chest in frustration. Was she using some new laundry detergent, was that where the itching was coming from? Shit, she could have hit herself with a wet newspaper when realisation hit. The vietnamese restaurant was using peanuts. Crap.  
Oh shit oh shit, this couldn’t be happening.  
No Amy, calm down. You. Are. Not. Having. A. Reaction. It’s gonna pass in a minute.  
It didn’t though. And the itching got continually worse. 

Rose frowned while waiting for dinner, where the hell was Amy? There was no way her aunt was that fascinating, it wasn’t as if Amy actually liked this one.  
While Rosa scrunched up her face in confusion and worry, Amy had decided to just go back inside - it wasn’t as if being outside was helping at all, so she might as well stand next to Rosa.  
Rosa smiled when she saw Amy returning, okay so the call might have a taken a little longer than usual, but here she was - smiling.  
“Hey babe”  
“Hi”, Amy stood next to Rosa leaning on the taller woman’s shoulder while discreetly clawing away at her chest (while silently damning herself for trimming her nails in expectation of what was supposed to, but what was definitely not happening later).  
Rosa eyed the girl at the register and nodded when she asked who had ordered two salads to go. 

When going to the car, Amy figured her reaction might have passed, it wasn’t getting any worse - but the dull thumping in her chest didn’t subside either.  
Rosa clicked the car keys and the lights flickered to show, that the car wasn’t locked.  
Amy silently got into the passenger side, with Rosa eying her suspiciously - they usually fought over who got to drive. Not that Rosa was about to argue as she figured that Amy was just tired. She had been awfully quiet, though she wasn’t smiling any less than she used to.  
On their way home, Rosa lost in thoughts about a current case, Amy could feel her cheeks get warm. She eyed Rosa out of the corner of her eye, silently praying to God like her abuela taught her, that she wouldn’t notice that something was of.  
Either she had forgotten how to pray the right way, or God decided he was done with her half-assed i-need-you praying, because Rosa looked at her just then. She smiled, and Rosa mistook her pink cheeks for blushing at being caught staring. While Amy quickly returned her eyes to the road, Rosa’s lips turned up in a smirk.  
Oh so she is blushing, wonder what’s going through her head. Rosa had never had such an urge to “accidentally” dropkick their dinner out the window of the moving car as she did when Amy touched her lips while her breath hitched slightly.  
Damn, wonder what got her so worked up.

In reality, Amy wasn’t caught up in some dirty fantasy day dreaming session. Her lips had gotten numb, which was the final step before her throat started to tighten. She whimpered and covered her mouth in the hope of not alarming Rosa. Though Rosa just smirked in her seat at the sound.  
When Rosa hit park, Amy was practically flying out the car, her purse dangling from her shoulder and leaving the takeout to Rosa. She fumbled her way through her purse while coughing slightly and did a mental victory dance when she found her keys (color coded so she wouldn’t forget which key would open the entryway door, and which would open the front door of their appartment). She practically wriggled the lock open and rushed Rosa inside, letting her walk first up the stairs. 

With shaking hands Amy dug through her purse. Where the FUCK is it. Oh shit. Oh Shit. Come oooon. YES! Amy dug out her wallet and unzipped it with shaking hands. The little blue pills where still there! Thank god for “always being prepared”. Against doctor’s orders, she quickly swallowed two of the antihistamines and imagined that her heart rhythm had already slowed down. Though that wasn’t actually the case. 

She nudged Rosa aside and unlocked the door, kicking her shoes off and leaving them in a messy pile (which really wasn’t like her at all. But her being in actual danger of suffocating to death, she figured that they could wait). Rosa had been faster and was already in the kitchen, not caring about the dark marks her boots would make on the floor, when Amy got there, using the cooker to make the tea they got with their dinner. That was it, Rosa was in the way and Amy felt her throat tighten.

Her vision had been blurred since she was on the stairs, but now she saw little black and white dots swimming in front of her eyes. Her voice wobbled when she whispered  
“Please move”, Rosa looked at her, an eyebrow lifted.  
“Excuse me”  
“Please-” Amy’s voice now rough and silent tears sliding down her cheeks “- I can’t breathe”.  
Rosa moved in a flash, letting Amy get to the tap, and watched silently while Amy tried to swallow the water - but failing due to her tightened throat.  
“I’ll get the Epi-pen, go to the bedroom.”, Rosa ran through their shared office space and into the bathroom while frantically searching for the pen, her dark curls getting into her face and blocking her vision. Goddamn it Amy, Why the hell couldn’t you just have said something? For Fuck sake. She continued to rummage through their shared (was she whipped?) travel toiletry bag, but to no use, until her fingertips felt something plastic. She could have cried out in joy had the situation not been so dire. It wasn’t the Epi-pen, oh no, but it was something just as good. Hang on Babe she thought while pushing herself off of the bathroom floor, involuntarily wincing at the pain in her knees. Okay we need rugs, these tiles are killing me, though she almost rolled her eyes at thought But really Diaz, it’s not like you’re often on your knees on this floor. She could have barked out a loud laugh at the thought of what Amy would have added to that, most certainly something crude like Babe you’re on your knees out here often enough. Especially in the shower. 

Amy was crying now. I’m going to die. Oh my god - I’m dying. Her panic not helping her current situation at all, she supported all her weight on her arms, standing against the beautifully painted cream colored wall (her own choosing of course). She tried breathing deeply but felt her knees give in, just when Rosa swooped her into her arms and sat her down on the bed.  
“Here take this, It’s not the pen, but it’s a pill that goes under your tongue”, Amy put it in her mouth, grateful that it didn’t taste bad -her shoulders shaking with her silent sobs.  
She was trying to control her crying, as she knew that it wasn’t helping.  
Rosa simply sat there, worried out of her mind, silently kicking herself for not seeing that Amy was having a reaction. She gathered the shorter woman into her arms, and hugged her loosely in order to let her breathe, while mentally going through a list of what could have caused it. 

After a minute, Amy calmed down, and her sobbing got replaced by silent tears rolling down her fever hot cheeks. Rosa got up and let the other woman gather herself for a second. She threw out the dinner and started heating up some mac and cheese, the only right kind in her opinion being the one that came out of a box. And while the dinner would probably have been fine, there was no fucking way she was risking it. Better safe than sorry. 

***

Amy had changed her tearstained shirt when she returned, wearing an old academy sweater of Rosa’s which made Rosa smile. Her heart was still caught in her throat, and she almost cried when she saw Amy standing in front of her with her messed up ponytail and in a too big sweater. She could have been dead, and you didn’t even see it. Goddamnit Diaz, what the hell is wrong with you. She smiled weakly at her girlfriend and continued stirring the pot.

“Where is the dinner?”, Amy looked at the golden macaroni mix that Rosa was stirring.  
“In the trash”, her voice offering little insight as to why that might be the case.  
“Ehm, why?”, Amy looked confused, and Rosa wasn’t having it. There was no way Santiago was allowed to pretend like her almost dying less than five minutes ago wasn’t something big enough for Rosa to throw away some damn take out.  
“Why?, Well I didn’t feel like eating a salad anyways so...” her eyes narrowing “Why the fuck do you think?! You almost died! Two minutes ago you were turning blue, loosing consciousness- “ Rosa was hysterical, she was shouting and Amy almost got angry enough to shout back, until she realized something.  
Rosa was scared. Rosa Diaz, badass extraordinaire was scared out of her mind. So instead of getting into one of the screaming matches the latina couple was known for, she opened her arms and hugged her girlfriend tight. It wasn’t like her voice was back quite yet, her throat still sore and her ability to over shadow Rosa’s hoarse voice with her own higher pitch, still lacking, so she decided on a calmer alternative.

The taller woman tentatively let herself be gathered into Amy’s arms, afraid of stealing her oxygen by giving her a real hug. There was no way Amy was accepting that and gave a bone crushing hug, which Rosa returned wholeheartedly. She was sobbing her heart out so violently she was shaking and Amy started crying too. She rarely saw this side of Rosa, as she wasn’t that well rounded in showing emotions. Sometimes even leaving Amy to wonder if she had them.

“Hey it’s okay. I’m not dying, I’m still here”  
“I know” Rosa was still crying, but her sobs becoming fewer and farther in between.  
There was no way Rosa was letting go of her girlfriend. Her very much alive girlfriend whom she would be cuddling all night and not even once wondering about how she rated on the badass-scale.


	2. Cookies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Person A is baking cookies and has to split their attention between watching the timer and fighting off Person B, who keeps trying to steal cookie dough from the bowl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure this prompt has been done before, but I figured that I'd give it a shot :)  
> This chapter is bordering on mature (I think? I'm not really good with ratings) but is not actually explicit.

There was going to be a blood drive at work tomorrow, well in a couple of hours really, and someone just HAD to sign them up to supply the sweetened goods that would make sure that those who donated, would still be able to do their job. That the “someone” was Amy, was self-explanatory to those who knew her.

Everyone knew that Amy’s thanksgiving dinner had been a disaster - according to Amy due to several different factors, which were all important when looking at the bigger picture- but according to Rosa, solely due to the fact, that her cooking was absolutely disastrous. Or in her own words: Fucking awful.   
And yes, that might be the reason why Rosa was the one covered in granulated sugar at two thirty in the middle of the night with Amy perched on the counter in nothing but an oversized t-shirt that might - or might not - have been stolen from one of her brothers at a point in time. She did look cute though, Rosa had to admit, though she was still pretending to be mad about the whole baking debacle and so, she wouldn’t say it out loud. Sure, Rosa could cook, at least well enough to follow a recipe, so it wasn’t that odd, that out of the two of them, she was the one doing the baking as her success rate was better than one to a million (that observation earned her smack on the arm from the smaller brunette). And here they were, Rosa’s black t-shirt, grey due to sugar and flour, and an almost finished dough.

“Baby?” Amy looked at her grinningly, “How much is left to do?”  
“Not much, I just have to add the eggs and the chocolate” Rosa’s frown was growing more prominent while reading the recipe, and that was when Amy saw her opening.  
The latina watched her lover carefully out of the corner of her eye while stretching in order to reach into the bowl, and just when she got her fingers into the sugary deliciousness, Rosa turned to look at her.  
“What are you doing” Her eyebrows quirked and Amy simply hummed in reply, having started to slowly lick the batter of her index finger. When she finished, she turned to dig into the bowl yet again, but was denied by Rosa who lifted the bowl the the other side of the counter. Leaving Amy to look at her back, from her place on the kitchen island.

Rosa had mixed the last ingredients before Amy started to move again, this time slipping down from the counter and moving to stand behind her, with her head leaning on Rosa’s shoulder and her arms slipping around her trim waist. “You made me do this, it’s in the middle of the night and I’m fucking beat, so move out of my way so I can finish” the rough tone didn’t make Amy flinch as one might have expected, quite the opposite actually as her grin quickly reached her eyes. “Babe come one, just a little taste” how Amy, the nervous aiming-to-please fluffball, had gotten so good at using double entendres in a suggestive tone, was beyond Rosa and as she turned to look at her girlfriend, the woman quickly snatched the wooden spoon out of her hand and started eating the cookie batter.   
Rosa being the one in charge of actually baking the cookies was having trouble watching the timer and keeping Amy away from what was left of the cookie dough. Trying to save the rest of the batter and make sure that the outcome would actually be more than the 20 cookies currently in the oven, turned out to be harder than expected.   
Amy handed her the spoon and blinked innocently when she saw Rosa’s flustered expression. She was enjoying that she got to be the one toying with her girlfriend for once instead of the other way around, as was more often than not the case. Rosa on the other hand was not enjoying the sudden attention, okay fine - she was, but she was also insanely frustrated that Amy decided to tease her right when she was busy doing something else. Though she supposed that was part of the fun. Rosa was one saucy smile from Amy away from just giving up and letting Amy explain why their “donation” was black and tasted suspiciously much like coal. 

The curly haired woman turned away from her lover to check on the built-in oven clock. Sighing when she realized that there was still a few minutes left before the next batch could go in, she turned to her lover who was yet again trying to steal the dough. That was it. 

“Amy stop it”  
“But babe it’s so good” Amy moaned and licked her finger “Here, have a taste”  
“Amy there is no way, you’ve just been licking your fingers and there are raw eggs in this!” Rosa said and pointed exasperated to the bowl, which was undeniably less full than a minute ago. Amy pouted “But babe -” Rosa cut her off quickly “No, and stop calling me babe, you got me into this mess so you damn better stop eating the cake batter” Amy, having sometime during Rosa checking on the oven, found her place back onto the counter jumped down to stand right in front of her sullen girlfriend “Come on, don’t be mad” the smaller latina wrapped her hands around the taller woman’s neck. Rosa wasn’t giving in without a fight and slammed Amy against the kitchen island, her girlfriend letting out a surprised gasp. Her eyes were stormy and it made her girlfriend worried for just a moment, that she might have stepped too far with her little game. Though her worry quickly disappeared when her lips were caught in a heated kiss. She moaned and ran her hands through her girlfriend’s hair, loving the feel of the unruly curls against her fingers. Just as it was starting to get really good, the timer went off and Rosa untangled herself so fast it left Amy stunned. 

Between taking out a baking sheet and trying to avoid burning herself, she didn’t notice that Amy had sneaked right between Rosa herself and the bowl. While her girlfriend was busy getting the cookies moved to a wire cooling rack Amy started to eat the batter, but stopped when she realized that Rosa wasn’t looking at her. When the other woman finally looked up from her project, her eyes were fiery when she looked at Amy. “Amy. Move” “Why?” The question was asked teasingly, and with just enough sing-song to let Rosa know, that she knew exactly why she should move. “Because if you don’t move in the next ten seconds, I’m gonna move you myself”. “But Babe I want to help” Rosa’s perfectly manicured eyebrows rose all the way up to her hairline “You want to help? Really?” Amy almost felt bad, it was her that got them into this mess, and she hadn’t exactly been helpful. “Sure”, Rosa smirked Uh uh, that can’t be good thought Amy, and had to admit to herself that she found her girlfriend’s expression incredibly sexy if a bit unnerving.   
Rosa used her arms to circle Amy’s waist, just as Amy had done only minutes prior, and guided her towards the baking sheet while moving the bowl with her right hand. “Okay you just make even sized dollops of batter, and no more than twenty, we don’t want them to be too small” Amy smiled, this she could do, there was almost no way for her to fuck that up. 

Okay, it turned out that with Rosa touching her like that, it was entirely possible for her to fuck up making batter balls on the baking sheet. She bit her lip, not wanting to give Rosa the satisfaction of hearing her moan. Rosa though had other plans and raked her hands up under Amy’s shirt, happily discovering that she wasn’t wearing anything underneath it - though not really expecting her to. She always found it so satisfactory to peel of Amy’s perfectly pristine pyjamas, but seeing her in nothing but a huge “garbage circa 1995” t-shirt did something to her, and Rosa tweaked her left nipple while scratching her stomach. Amy bit her lip and tried to focus on finishing the cookies, with the clock nearing half past three, she found that she would much rather continue this in bed.

“Rosa-” She was panting now “Baby you can try to make me stop all you want, but if you continue asking while sounding like that I’m not going to, though I’m not going to stop no matter how you sound.” Amy was getting frustrated with the teasing but no actual touching. “Rosa please, I - “ “No. You’re gonna stand there and finish the cookies that you made us do for tomorrow”. Amy was struggling to even out her breathing, and just to mess with Rosa (who was teasing her, so it was fair game right?) she reached into the bowl and took a smudge of batter. Rosa hadn’t noticed and kept up her game of running her hands all over Amy’s smooth back and toned stomach, and just when she was going to squeeze her girlfriends ass, Amy turned around in the embrace and drew a streak of batter across the taller woman’s cheek. Rosa was stunned for a second and reacted by grabbing Amy’s ass all the harder than she had planned, which in turn had Amy moaning while she licked the savory treat off of Rosa.

Okay that’s it, cookies be damned. Amy had teased her all night and Rosa? She had had enough, so instead of insisting that her girlfriend finish the baking project, she lifted her up onto the counter and crushed their lips together. With Rosa’s hand on her thighs, frantically stroking up and down, Amy pulled her girlfriend even closer, if possible, and relished in the moan she got, when she bit the other latina’s lip. As she wasn’t wearing much clothing, her makeshift pyjamas quickly found its way to the floor, and she was naked in seven seconds flat (Yes, Rosa was counting). Amy whimpered and pulled on Rosa’s ratty tank top which was gone in a flash, leaving her in only a bra and panties. 

Rosa’s hands found Amy’s inner thighs, and in anticipation of what was to come - Amy spread her legs wider- Rosa smiled into the kiss and let her hands skit along to where only her girlfriend’s pant suit seams, got to touch during office hours (except that one time, which was awesome). Just when her nimble fingers neared their destination, the timer went off, and though it was really hard to tear herself away, she figured that it would be a really good lesson for her girlfriend. She was right, and Amy cried out when she went to switch the baking sheets. 

Amy watched her girlfriend and pouted, she was wet and ready and she had just been ignored. Okay so maybe it was totally her own fault, but still? Couldn’t Rosa take a little mercy on her and let her come? Just once, that was all she asked for. The answer seemed to be no, and Amy got all the more worked up when she saw Rosa’s nipples turn hard in her bra, after she had stood in front of the oven. The way her girlfriend’s muscular arms worked while she was busy with the spatula used for moving the cookies, made Amy hum- which in turn made Rosa turn.

Rosa looked at her lover coyly, She can’t wait? Interesting and decided to tease her a little further, never having actually touched where Amy wanted her to. When she finished with the cookies, she concluded that they could go to bed with a (very) good conscience. She turned to Amy and eyed the dirty bowl out of the corner of her eye. She kissed her lover so forcefully that they were both left breathless, and while Amy tried to recover from the loss of oxygen, Rosa slipped a hand into the bowl and spread cookie batter all over Amy’s upper chest. She continued with licking it all of.

“You’re right, it really is a tasty batter” Amy looked at her girlfriend under hooded eyes “I thought you said it was disgusting because of the raw eggs?” Rosa scoffed “I also said that I wouldn’t have a taste because you had licked your fingers, I think we both know that isn’t true” Amy smiled “Yea, we can totally agree that you can lick my fingers after everything else you’ve had near your mouth” Rosa sent her a glare “When did you get so crude little miss priss?”. Amy giggled “I was always crude, you just didn’t know it. Now take me to bed” Rosa stroked her inner thigh “Tell me Peralta knows how vulgar you are and that it kills him” Amy rolled her eyes “Are you really talking about Jake right now? I swear to god Rosa! but seriously - if you don’t take me to bed in the next thirty seconds so help me god i am finishing this myself”

Amy jumped of the counter, and made sure to touch as much of Rosa as humanly possible while ducking down to pick up her shirt, giving her girlfriend a terrific view of her exposed ass. Rosa picked up the smaller latina “That’s it, we’re going to bed. Now” Amy laughed “That was what i thought”.


End file.
